Who is Amma?
In the eyes of the world, Sri Vasantha Sai Amma is a simple village woman with limited education. Amma was born in 1938 in a small village named Vaddakampatti in Tamil Nadu.
In the spiritual realm, Sri Vasantha Sai Amma’s love and devotion to Bhagavan Sri Sathya Sai Baba has made her the epitome of “Radha Conciousness”. Her quiet, unassuming nature, simple and down to earth personality masks Her highest spiritual realization of Nayaki Bhava (attitude and realization as Lord’s Consort).
You may ask what is “Radha Conciousness”?
Bhagavan Baba says: "It is not correct to think that Radha is a name of a woman or her's is an ordinary human love. God does not make differences such as man or woman. If one surrenders like Radha, whether He is a man or a woman, it will be considered as Radha’s aspect. Those who have this aspect can think of nothing but God; they never think otherwise. Radha is a jnani, though she lives in this world, she does not allow the world to live in her. To experience this, one should know about Radha’s devotion."
It is in these lines Bhagavan revealed to Amma “You are Radha…” What has made Bhagavan call Amma as Radha?
Let us hear from Amma.
“I want only Bhagavan, nothing but Him. All my mind, senses, ego, intellect are screaming, “I do not want anything else, only Swami!” Since I am not able to bear this force, I am always crying.
“Throughout my seventy years of penance Swami has shown, said and done so much for me; He has showered many blessings. He told me that I am Radha, Durga, Shakthi, Mahalakshmi. My Prema though was not content with all these titles. My yearning never diminished, it only increased. Swami told me in 1997 that I am in the Jeevan Muktha state and that He has accepted me totally, merging in me. Yet I remained unsatisfied.”
“Swami then called me to the Vashista cave and it was there that I merged with Him on 17 April 2002. Even though I have united with Him purifying the mind, ego, intellect and the senses, I thought this physical body was left behind. I cried that the physical body should also be purified and worthy to be offered to Him.”
“On 27 April 2003, Swami asked me to come to Brindavan, Uttar Pradesh. It is here that Swami showed me the vision of RadhaKrishna marriage and said that the physical body was offered to Him. Yet my burning desire did not find fulfillment. The craving, “I want Swami,” crossed all boundaries.”
Why this Prema? Why do I always have the feeling I do not have enough of Swami’s love? How ever much I experience God, I never feel that it is enough. ‘I want God’. What is this continuous burning within me? How does this crying continue even after I have attained Him, my Swami! It is not the yearning of today or yesterday, but has been with me from my earliest years.
Here is a poem that I wrote as a young child...
Lord Indra has a thousand eyes.
Why don’t I have a thousand eyes
To adore your beauty?
I have only two eyes!
These two eyes are not enough
To see Your divine Form.
Should I not have a thousand eyes like Indra?
Adisesha has a thousand tongues;
I have only one to sing your glories.
Krishna! Govinda! Murali! Mukunda!
Achuta! Amala! Hari! Prabhu!
My life...Bhagavan! This is not enough.
Should you not have given me a thousand tongues?
Like Adisesha to praise You?
Karthaveerya has a thousand hands.
Give me a thousand hands like him.
Oh! My Beloved, my Krishna
Give me a thousand hands to worship You,
To offer flowers, to clasp your feet.
Why am I born as a human being
In this world of darkness?
I do not have a thousand eyes, tongues or hands.
What shall I do?
“The yearning continues until this moment, any experience is not fulfilling. The burning desire for God is not under my control. After Swami told me in meditation how to divert my feelings towards the world, the intense craving that I have for Him found a new goal!
“My Prema should enter all living beings. My Prema is flowing everywhere, expanding and filling the entire world. I will transform the whole world with my Prema. Let everyone be filled with my Prema, let them experience my feelings, my craving for God. Then my yearning may reduce. How? I will see God through 1160 crores of eyes of the 580 crores people of the world. Added to this I will see through the eyes of all living beings because my Prema will rule all. I will drink the beauty of the Lord through the eyes of the entire world. I will rejoice looking at Him through all eyes.
Let everyone be filled with my Prema, let them experience my feelings, my craving for God.
“In the same way I will hold the feet of my Swami with 1160 crores of hands. I will pray and offer flowers. I will pray to my Lord with the folded hands of all beings, all will serve at His lotus feet. If I hold him with only two hands, He may escape like the fish that escapes while washing it, but I do not have to fear if I hold onto Him with 1160 crores of hands.
“I will call Him with 580 crores of tongues. I will sing His glories and praise Him. I will chant His victorious stories. The entire universe will be filled with my calls of Prema.
“Everywhere, my Prema, my Self. I am everything. 580 crores of people in the world are Vasantha, all living beings are only Vasantha.
“Oh! Mad Vasantha is it enough? Will your force of Prema now reduce? You are going to enjoy your Lord through all living beings. Will you be satisfied now? Will you get peace now? Will your eyes close to sleep now?” I asked myself…
My yearning will not end until this body unites with Him. This body will become jyothi and merge into Swami. I who have come from Him will return to Him….”
This is a glimpse of Amma’s fierce devotion and pure love for Bhagavan.
Amma’s life is one long saga of an individual soul, jeeva, yearning to merge with the Supreme Soul, Paramathma, Bhagavan. She shows how an individual soul realizes its cosmic form through faith, devotion and sadhana. She has melted her all in the love of her Lord, and has lost her individual identity.
So, Dear Readers … who is Amma?